Three Myths

Behavior change - such a riviting topic, but one that we face nearly every day. Have you found yourself saying "if only he would..." or "I need her to ______ differently/less/more"?

If you're like me, you've tried explaining why the change is important. You've tried incentivising. You may have even tried using a stick (not literally) and consequences.

All with mixed, inconsistent and unpredictable results, right?

I came across this TEDTalk last week, shared it with a few co-workers and am playing with how to use this new-found, seemingly common sense wisdom to help change behaviors inside my organization and beyond.

One of the key takeaways played out right in front of me hours after I watched this talk - it probably happens more than I think, but I was in a mental place where I could notice this time.

Seeing someone take a desired action dramatically increases the chances that others will perform that behavior, too. Around the 14:00 mark, the speaker shares the example of a street performer working for change. Yes, he seeds his case with change and it helps a little. But if he were to have a friend walk by every few minutes and toss in change in plain sight, others would follow the friend's lead and give.

It immediately struck me that this is what we as leaders and as members of a service organization have to do in order to get members to join, engage and make a difference. We must first do and they will follow.

Don't take my word for it...
I walked to a nearby cafe with a few co-workers to grab carry-out. A woman escorted a homeless man into the cafe and instructed him to get whatever he wanted - hot soup, a hearty sandwich - and proceeded to buy his lunch. Awesome, right?

I kept watching through the window as the pair distributed cups of soup and wrapped sandwiches to two other men camped on the street corner outside the cafe. She sat with them in the cold, ate and chatted.

One of the men - a wheelchair-bound veteran - is on the same corner daily and I watch as the masses shuffle past, keeping their spare change in their pockets. I've walked past this man countless times and have done the same.

But I watched as that day became different. While the woman was with them and her generosity was visible, the outpouring from others was abundant. I'd guess 50% of the people walking by dropped change or handed folded bills to the three men.

Why was that? What made the difference in their behavior? I believe the principle was true: model the behavior you'd like to see and others will follow your lead.

Have you seen this to be the case in your workplace, your home or your club?